Older Wallpaper

...just never posted this one...

I edit shit all the time, I'm really surprised that not a lot of my stuff is in posts on here...

Hrm.

Anyway, Muse heart thing, in purple. Love it!

Desktop Wallpaper I Made!

Oooooh, he's so pretty, especially in purple! ♥

(If you don't know who this is, read my blog more, and listen to good music.)

The resolution is lower than I wanted, because Photobucket won't make things as big as I'd like them, and I use Photobucket to edit stuff, so, hey, I get owned.

Luckily, this still looks awesome, even if it's stretched out a little.

My natural screen resolution is 1366 x 768... hello widesreen!

Bad Paper #2 - Draft #3

not really different - think I'm only going to turn in two drafts

Lisette Mulvey would be a typical middle school student if she didn't have have to worry about getting prescription eye drops, about her scars, or the dead nerves in her face. She would be a typical middle school student if her father hadn't have broken her eye socket, nose, and mentally damaged her for life. She'd be normal if she didn't have to wear dark-purple tinted prescription glasses, and if her vision wasn't horribly clouded and blurred. She'd be just like everyone else at her tender age of thirteen years if she realized that her life is horribly void of a responsible, sane, parental figure. But, Lisette Mulvey is not a typical middle school student - she is the protagonist of Joyce Carol Oates' short story, ID.
Among her other issues, her parents are divorced, her mother goes out with whoever, whenever, and does whatever, without telling her daughter when or even if she will be returning, and her father is a figure existent only in her thoughts, because as far as she knows, he is a sergeant in the Army. Yet, somehow, this girl thinks that her life is not so terrible. She's more concerned about boys, her friends, and being "mature." In the story, these issues are the only ones that Lisette actually acknowledges. This poor being has far more problems than she cares to see, and Joyce litters her work with clues alluding to Lisette's additional unmentioned issues.
The first issue not directly addressed by Lisette is her rather lacking ability in determining character. Lisette is interested in a boy by the name of JC - a boy who has been held back for multiple years, so he is significantly older than the other students and therefore more likely to exploit a younger girl, a boy when asked if he had ever shot a person who just just shrugs and laughs, and a boy who the other students know as a person that “you didn't trifle with.” Lisette doesn't see the problems that could arise by trusting this boy - she only sees his "silky black hair falling across his forehead," but because Oates implements the other, more negative details, the reader is clued in on Lisette's fault.
The second issue that Lisette does not see, but the reader does, is the fact that her father has some severe problems with controlling his anger. She cannot see that the fact that her father "[was] shouting behind her, swiping with his fists - not meaning to hit her" as a complication in her life. She loves her father, and thinks that, "Daddy didn't mean to hurt me." Oates' descriptions of the event once again, clue the reader in on the true conditions of Lisette's life.
Lisette's mother is the central issue the entire story. She tells her daughter that she is a blackjack dealer at the Casino Royale. There are many clues that inform the reader that Lisette is not being told the truth about her mother's profession. Her mother has never given a direct answer to Lisette's questions about what she does for a living, and furthermore, her mother does not want her to wear lipstick, a common symbol of the desire to be sexual. Now - these two clues don't seem to be too significant in determining what Lisette's mother does for a living, but additional clues revealed at the climax of the story tie everything together. A dead woman is found in a drainage ditch outside of a sleazy motel -- not an uncommon place for a freshly slain hooker -- and Lisette is brought to a morgue to identify this woman. Lisette is shown a red jacket and a handbag, in which there is a wallet, in which there is an ID. The jacket, handbag, and wallet resemble garments owned by Lisette's mother, and the ID is revealed to be Yevette Muvley's. Lisette's mother is a dead prostitute. Yet, when even presented with her mother's dead mangled corpse, she cannot see that her life is horrible.
Lisette is blind, and Oates even alludes to her blindness in multiple ways. Glasses are a common symbol for needing aid with seeing correctly, and Lisette dons her glasses everyday, all day. Lisette also identifies people by their features, race, and sex. She does not once mention that she knows a person in her life by their personality. She is blind to characteristics that make people who they truly are. Additionally, Oates employs the color purple to identify negative things in Lisette's life. Lisette's lipstick is a luscious purple color, and Lisette's mother, in a flash back, leaves purple kiss marks all over her then husband, and even Lisette's glasses' lenses' are tinted purple.
Because this girl is so blind to the terrible circumstances of her life, she has the ability to deny her reality. And she does not deny this reality because she is a young girl, and therefore immature, she denies it because the denial of things that are detrimental in life was actively practiced by her mother. Lisette's mother knew who and what she was - but she told her daughter otherwise. She never admitted that she was a prostitute. She was a "blackjack dealer" at a "casino."
In the end, when Lisette is confronted with her mother's dead body, she cannot cope with the truth. She denies the truth again and again, telling herself that it is not possible, because her mother just simply cannot be the "thing" on the steel table. She instantaneously is taken to a bathroom, where she almost throws up. Almost - Lisette catches herself. That corpse was not her mother. She then demands to be taken back to her school, so she can continue living her life. She wants to see JC, and eat lunch. When she arrives, Lisette's friend Keisha inquires if she is “O.K.” to which she replies, while laughing into the “bright buzzing blur,” “Sure I'm O.K. Hell, why not?” She returns to the girl who knows only what she has seen, and she had not seen her mother earlier that morning. She continues to live in a daze, in denial, and blindly. She refuses to cope with the reality of her life. And that's the end of Joyce Carol Oates' tale.
Now, every work is created for a reason - whether for simple pleasure, or to teach a lesson, or some other reason. This work, ID, was written to make its readers think. It was written to make its readers think about the true circumstances of their own lives, and how they deal with them. Lisette's story is simply the means in which Oates uses to begin the train of thought.

Oates, Joyce Carol. "ID." The New Yorker 29 Mar. 2010: 80-88. Print.

Self-Assessment Questions:

What are the strengths of your writing? Which parts work well, and which parts work best?
-- Once again I feel as if my voice is my strong point. I also feel like this essay is a little more clear than the last I wrote. I don't really know, but I also feel like the fact that my character's life is so screwed up helps keep the reader interested. I also like my introduction, I feel that it would grab interest well.

What heights did you reach for? How much did you challenge yourself in this writing?
-- Again, I tried my best. I think I challenged myself to a degree that I am content with, considering ID was not very simple to analyze.

Which elements, devices, punctuation, or rhetorical effects from Gorrell did you use?
-- I feel like this paper again, uses dashes a lot, and alliteration (not nearly as much as the last!), and all the common things I do...

Which parts did you have trouble developing?
-- I had crazy amounts of trouble structuring this paper, and keeping my focus. I find it difficult to make and follow my own prompts. Hopefully the paper makes more sense now. :)

Which mental processes did you sue during the drafting?
-- I did a few outlines for this paper. One on paper, and another on my laptop, per draft.

How many hours did you spend on it? How did you allocate your time?
-- I spent a hefty amount of time on this paper because my second draft is almost a complete rewrite. I feel like the times when I worked the hardest were when I was figuring out what to write about and how to write about it. Once I had my structure and idea down it wasn't so bad.

Is there anything in particular you'd like me to attend to as I read?
-- I really like the phrase "freshly slain hooker." It makes me happy.

Whom would you acknowledge as helpers? Sources? Someone who gave you an idea? Peer edited?
-- This time, I wrote some of my paper in Porter's 5th floor lounge (which is full of my friends, among other people) and asked those who were present from time to time if what I was saying made sense, and I somewhat used them as a thesaurus. My peer editors also helped me quite a bit this time by simply telling me, "I don't get it. Can you explain this more?"

Bad Paper #2 - Draft #2

Lisette Mulvey would be a typical middle school student if she didn't have have to worry about getting prescription eye drops, about her scars, or the dead nerves in her face. She would be a typical middle school student if her father hadn't have broken her eye socket, nose, and mentally damaged her for life. She'd be normal if she didn't have to wear dark-purple tinted prescription glasses, and if her vision wasn't horribly clouded and blurred. She'd be just like everyone else at her tender age of thirteen years if she realized that her life is horribly void of a responsible, sane, parental figure. But, Lisette Mulvey is not a typical middle school student - she is the protagonist of Joyce Carol Oates' short story, ID.
Among her other issues, her parents are divorced, her mother goes out with whoever, whenever, and does whatever, without telling her daughter when or even if she will be returning, and her father is a figure existent only in her thoughts, because as far as she knows, he is a sergeant in the Army. Yet, somehow, this girl thinks that her life is not so terrible. She's more concerned about boys, her friends, and being "mature." In the story, these are the only things that Lisette actually acknowledges. This poor being has far more problems than she cares to see, and Joyce litters her work with clues alluding to Lisette's additional not mentioned issues.
The first issue not directly addressed by Lisette is her rather lacking ability in determining character. Lisette is interested in a boy by the name of JC - a boy who has been held back for multiple years, so he is significantly older than the other students and therefore more likely to exploit a younger girl, a boy when asked if he had ever shot a person who just just shrugs and laughs, and a boy who the other students know as a person that “you didn't trifle with.” Lisette doesn't see the issues with this boy - she only sees his "silky black hair falling across his forehead," but because Oates implements the other, more negative details, the reader is clued in on Lisette's fault.
The second issue that Lisette does not see, but the reader does, is the fact that her father has some problems with controlling his anger. She cannot see that the fact that her father "[was] shouting behind her, swiping with his fists - not meaning to hit her" as a complication in her life. She loves her father, and thinks that, "Daddy didn't mean to hurt me." Oates' descriptions of the event once again, clue the reader in on the true conditions of Lisette's life.
Lisette's mother is the central issue the entire story. She tells her daughter that she is a blackjack dealer at the Casino Royale. There are many clues that inform the reader that Lisette is not being told the truth about her mother's profession. Her mother has never given a direct answer to Lisette's questions about what she does for a living, and furthermore, her mother does not want her to wear lipstick, a common symbol of the desire to be sexual. Now - these two clues don't seem to be too significant in determining what Lisette's mother does for a living, but additional clues revealed at the climax of the story tie everything together. A dead woman is found in a drainage ditch outside of a sleazy motel -- not an uncommon place for a freshly slain hooker -- and Lisette is brought to a morgue to identify this woman. Lisette is shown a red jacket and a handbag, in which there is a wallet, in which there is an ID. The jacket, handbag, and wallet resemble garments owned by Lisette's mother, and the ID is revealed to be Yevette Muvley's. Lisette's mother is a dead prostitute. Yet, when even presented with her mother's dead mangled corpse, she cannot see that her life is horrible.
Lisette is blind, and Oates even alludes to her blindness in multiple ways. Glasses are a common symbol for needing aid with seeing correctly, and Lisette wears her glasses everyday, all day. Lisette also identifies people by their features, race, and sex. She does not once mention that she knows a person in her life by their personality. She is blind to characteristics that make people who they truly are. Additionally, Oates employs the color purple to identify negative things in Lisette's life. Lisette's lipstick is a luscious purple color, and Lisette's mother, in a flash back, leaves purple kiss marks all over her then husband, and even Lisette's glasses' lenses' are tinted purple.
Because this girl is so blind to the terrible circumstances of her life, she can deny her reality. And she does not deny this reality because she is a young girl, and therefore immature, she denies it because the denial of things that are detrimental in life was actively practiced by her mother. Lisette's mother knew who and what she was - but she told her daughter otherwise. She never admitted that she was a prostitute. She was a "blackjack dealer" at a "casino."
In the end, when Lisette is confronted with her mother's dead body, she cannot cope with the truth. She denies the truth again and again, telling herself that it is not possible, because her mother just simply cannot be the "thing" on the steel table. She instantaneously is taken to a bathroom, where she almost throws up. Almost - Lisette catches herself. That corpse was not her mother. She then demands to be taken back to her school, so she can continue living her life. She wants to see JC, and eat lunch. When she arrives, Lisette's friend Keisha inquires if she is “O.K.” to which she replies, while laughing into the “bright buzzing blur,” “Sure I'm O.K. Hell, why not?” She returns to the girl who knows only what she has seen, and she had not seen her mother earlier that morning. She continues to live in a daze. She refuses to cope with the reality of her life. And that's the end of Joyce Carol Oates' tale.
Every work is created for a reason - whether for simple pleasure, or to teach a lesson, or some other reason. This work, ID, was written to make its readers think. It was written to make its readers think about the true circumstances of their own lives, and how they deal with them. Lisette's story is simply the means in which Oates uses to begin the train of thought.

Oates, Joyce Carol. "ID." The New Yorker 29 Mar. 2010: 80-88. Print.

Bad Paper #2

Darlene McCoy
Margaret Amis
Writing 2
6 May 2010
Dear Reality, You've Been Denied!
As the story ID, by Joyce Carol Oates opens, readers are taken to a 7th grade math class where they find a mildly buzzed protagonist working hard to pass a lusciously purple kiss imprinted on a Kleenex to a boy “you didn't trifle with” who went by the name of JC. When there is a knock at the classroom door her teacher, Ms. Nowicki, goes to open it, and this protagonist, Lisette, takes her chance. The boy receives the note, crumples it, and shoves it in his pocket. She then hears her name called by the figures at the door - two police officers. The officers take Lisette to the local hospital, and proceed downstairs to the morgue. Lisette is asked to identify a woman's body - potentially her mother's. When she observes the body, Lisette instantaneously denies that it could even possibly be her mother. Lisette cannot see - she cannot even begin to think that her mother is the mangled corpse sprawled out on the steel bed.
Lisette Mulvey would be a typical middle schooler if she didn't have have to worry about getting prescription eye drops, didn't have to worry about her scars, or the dead nerves in her face. Lisette Mulvey would be a typical middle schooler if her father hadn't have broken her eye socket, nose, and mentally damaged her for life. She wouldn't have to wear dark-purple tinted prescription glasses. Her vision wouldn't be horribly clouded. She'd be just like everyone else - infatuated with her looks, and what the boys thought when they looked at her.
The glasses and injury that set her apart are a symbol of Lisette's inability to conscientiously identify her world. She cannot see that JC will exploit or potentially hurt her in the future. She cannot see that her father has anger issues. She cannot see that her mother is dead, even when her corpse is thrust before her eyes. She only sees what she wants, and anything else, well, just does not exist. She does not accept anything that is potentially detrimental to her life. She simply lives, day by day, not even caring for which day it is, dazed by her own actions, and sometimes, other forms of intoxication. How do we, then, as readers know that these terrible things are true?
Oates guides us to these conclusions by adding tidbits of information to her story. In the case of JC, Oates includes one sentence that undoubtedly lets us know who he is: "A girl had asked JC if he'd ever shot anybody and JC had just shrugged and laughed." Most 7th graders don't shoot people, or even know how to use a gun, or for that matter, own guns. Lisette's own description of how she came across her injuries reveals her father's issues, and even more so, her inability to realize those issues. "Daddy [was] shouting behind her, swiping with his fists - not meaning to hit her." There are many clues sprinkled into the entire short story that lead to the conclusion that the dead woman in the morgue is Lisette's mother. The fact that she disappears randomly for unknown numbers of days, the fact that she finds ways to weasel out of answering direct questions about her profession, and the fact that Lisette's mother doesn't want her to wear lipstick are all subtle clues to her prostitution. And this dead woman was found in a drainage ditch behind a sleazy motel -- not an uncommon resting place for a freshly slain hooker. Mentioning that the wallet found near the corpse carried the ID of Yvette Mulvey could even be considered a not-so-subtle hint, yet Lisette still refuses to see any connections between any of the aforementioned ideas.
When Lisette is finally confronted with the issues surrounding her parents, she cannot cope with the ideas presented to her. Officer Molina, the cop that is most focused on in the story, tells Lisette that her father is not, in fact, a sergeant in the army anymore, but that he has been AWOL from his position for a year. She is so shocked that she begins to shiver furiously. She cannot control the truth. Next, the officer leads her over to the corpse. Lisette looks over the body, thinking that, “This was not a woman, but a thing – you could not really believe that it had ever been a woman. Some sad, pathetic, broken female, like debris washed up on the shore.” She begins gagging, and the officer leads her to a restroom in case of vomiting. Lisette demands to be taken back to school, taken back to JC. The officers comply, and when she arrives, Lisette's friend Keisha inquires if she is “O.K.” to which Lisette replies, while laughing into the “bright buzzing blur,” “Sure I'm O.K. Hell, why not?” She returns to the girl who knows only what she has seen, and she had not seen her mother earlier that morning. She continues to live in a daze. She refuses to cope with the reality of her life.
And who could blame her? Her mother was a prostitute, found dead in a ditch, her father was a raging lunatic with anger issues, and from the way her life is going, she herself will possibly follow in her mother's footsteps, her first client being JC. She has nobody, no one, not one person in the world to turn to. Nobody to take her to get her prescription eye drops, nobody to tell her to care enough about herself to wash, nobody to tell her what's right from wrong. Is it okay for this girl to just deny reality, because hers is so horrid, or should she try to confront it and conquer it?
Lisette Mulvey is used as the protagonist in Joyce Carol Oates' short story, ID, to explore how this grimy, grungy girl copes when the true circumstances of her life are shoved in her face, like a plate of freshly prepared worms, still squirming. And through her experience -- readers are forced to attempt to identify their own "true circumstances,” and ponder the idea of denying reality.

DerpDeDerpDerp

I feel much better now.

SOLIKE, lots of shit has happened.

Like, lots, of, shit.

But Cameron is here being a dork.

'cause he's dorky and stuff.

Reading

this

stuff

stuff
stuff
stuff

MAYBE I should write a poem

using stuff

as my repeating word

'cause I kinda have to do that anyway

DAMN YOU POETRY

:)

Actually, I've got to write two poems,

and read some stuff

but I like the reading, the writers are good,

and it's not like, analytical reading, I can actually enjoy it!

But I think Cameron's bored now...

SO!

He will continue to do his work,

and I'll tell you, oh dear blogger,

what has been going on with my life

considering that, uh,

I kinda said there would be some INTENSE FUCKING POSTS after Jan 4th,

and it's um,

kinda

like

Jan 17th

...! Only a few days 'til Riley's birthday!

Oooooh~ That'll be so fun~! ♥

Oh, I'm 19 now.

Cool.

Right!

Only Dylan is older than me :/

Deeeeeer.

Music makes me really happy

Mark makes me really happy

LIFE MAKES ME REALLY HAPPY!

Cameron Cameron Cameron,

I see you there..!

OKAY, SO FINALLY,

INTENSE SHIT

Okay, so

over winter break:

I went to a party
and uh
kinda sorta
really
flirted with a guy who got punched in the face (better known as KB'd) by my friend, Katie Butler

Getting KB'd is kinda self-explicable now, don't ya think~?

I think so.

My friend Alex also went streaking.

Yep.

That was funny.

Like, really, freakin', funny.

I ended up staying the night that night,

at my friend's ex-boyfriend who got punched in the face's house..

We watched Up, that cute little Disney movie about an old man, a boy scout, and a dodo bird, and some other crazy stuff...

Yeah, well, that was kind of an interesting party.

Pretty good, I know I enjoyed myself.

KSO,

After that, that Sunday, I believe,

I went to Hooters to watch a UFC match with some of the Rancho guys,
and some of the Rancho girls, but mostly just Kaylin...

I'm really not sure if that girl even likes me... haaaaaaaaaaa~

Well, I ended up paying waaaay too much compared to everyone else,

SO

No more Hooters with Rancho kids.

Fuck. That. Shit.

Yeppity-yep-yep~!

OKAY, SO THEN,

I got home from Hooters, and went out with Rory, Aaron, Matt, and Jacob,

just the usual Denny's thing, it makes me really happy
Rory's ex-girlfriend was there, made it even more hilarious/awkward.

Good times, OOOOH good times.

Aaron left after Denny's..

So me, Matt, and Jacob ended up at Rory's house at like 1-2 AM somehow, and nothing really interesting happened...

just chillin'-ness

oh and he had a PURPLE VIOLIN

I'd of probably bought it off of him if it was a purple viola, though..!

oh and he played the Unicorns, which made me miss college more.

Good lord, I missed college so much over break

SOOOOO MUUUUCH!

Okay, so like,

for the actual intense shit.

:]

ONE DAY, I WAS ON FACEBOOK.

*dramatic intense shit pause*

*DUN DUN DUUUUUN*

Deeeeer... okay.

....

So yeah, I was on facebook, bein' a loser and chatting with people from college 'n stuff...

One of those people happened to be my friend at the time, Tanner

APPARENTLY, he liked me.

APPARENTLY, I was like

...wtf?

K so, see, this was an interesting concept for me,

'cause, like, my amazing friend Allyson had dated him before,

but... I said okay anyway...

'cause I figured it was worth a shot 'n stuff

and it was..!

So, he and I continued to talk quite a bit over break,

Actually, I think every night except for like, one...

I dunno, I don't remember all that well

Break mostly consisted of me trying to suppress boredom with freakin' Starcraft

(I totally beat it..!)

and, uh, music,

(Mark and Juliaaaa~ ♥)

and, uh, HOLYFUCKGOODLORDSOMUCHFAMILY,

and, uh, insane video chats

TokBox.... YEAAAAAAH BOYYY :]

K SO,

back to Tanner!

We decided it'd be fun to surprise the people in the lounge with our new relationship-type-thing...

and it would've been

...if the people in the lounge thought that the relationship-type-thing was a good idea...

....but they didn't.

THEN, I was a total jerk to my BFF in the whole wide world, Mark.

I like, cuddle-iled him...

Twice.

FUCCCCCCCCCCCCK I'M A BAD PERSON.

Ryan just got back from San Jose.

That makes me really happy!

WOOHOO

Ok, so

Yeah, I was a really bad person.

THEN, I went to the gym with the girls and we talked.

A lot.

A LOT LOT.

Intense talking, 'n stuff.

I ran a mile, too~!

(I love to work out :D)

Heeeeeeeeeey-o!

Anyway, after talking with the girls,

the most trusted, the best

the Kendal, the Julia, and uh, Mark was there

but most of the time he was just kinda... still mad at me for being a jerk

God, I felt so awful... :(

but!

Julia and Kendal said that it was probably a bad idea,

and I'd talked to Allyson earlier that night,

and she said it was a bad idea, too.

and I'm sure Allyson's a little biased, but I think she was just being straight up honest with me because we're friends

and that's kinda what friends do, 'n stuff.

I love her! :]

So, that was like, Thursday,

or something

then it was my birthday...

so I enjoyed the hell out of that

like, a LOT

Got hella days stoned with Ryan

went to College 9/10

and had a FEAST!

(More details lateeeeer!)

But anyway,

I'll say more later.

Later.

Yeppity-yep-yep!